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aterahmeclawrence

Breaking the Chains: Healing the Bonds of Family Dysfunction, Honestly, Dysfunction in General...

Updated: Jul 23, 2023

Just had to get this out.

About 20 minutes and many words past a Facebook post's capacity it struck me that although not meaningless, I'm working on it, I promise. When something comes up I have a place that could benefit someone else if they want it to. The Warrior Queen Blog.

 

This may be a rant, and out of context.

But in typical Aterahme fashion, this is my word vomit of the day.

If only we could be a little more empathetic and communicate effectively half the issues of the world would cease to exist.

Instead, we divide and try to conquer knowing no one makes it to the finish line alone.

Instead, we build walls and barriers that only hurt.

Instead, we leave people out only to point the finger from the other side of that wall that we created ourselves.


It's a sad reality, an ode to familial dysfunction, a vicious cycle, a generational trauma repeating itself.

And a black butterfly can only help but watch from a distance as the space gets bigger, deeper, and more profound.


We have to learn to communicate even when it's uncomfortable or uneasy. Because one of the best ways to heal is simply getting everything out on the table.

Especially in families, there has to be a willingness and ability to communicate honestly, tolerate uncertainty and respect one another's differing needs both develop and define a family unit's resilience, during and after the crisis has come.


If you can relate to this, I feel you. I hear you. I see you.

It is so easy to feel uncared for when people aren't able to communicate and connect with you in the way you need. It's hard not to internalize that silence, the longing, and feel the abyss between you and those you love most in this world.


Most people are so caught up in their responsibilities, struggles, and anxieties, that the thought of asking someone else how they're doing doesn't even cross their mind. Perhaps they aren't inherently bad or uncaring--they're just busy and self-focused. And that's okay. It's not evidence of some fundamental failing on your part.



It doesn't make you unloveable or invisible. It just means that those people aren't very good at looking beyond their world. But the fact that you are--that despite the darkening you feel, you can share your love and light with others--is a strength. Your work isn't to change who you are; it's to find people who can give you the connection you need. Because despite what you feel, you are not too much. You are not too sensitive or too needy. You are thoughtful and empathetic. You are compassionate and kind. And with or without anyone's acknowledgment or affection, you are enough.



xo The Warrior Queen






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